Wednesday, 10 September 2014

The new bigger iPhone 6 (Warning: may contain traces of satire)

Wow! This is ground-breaking stuff! It's like discovering that the laws of thermodynamics no longer apply, or that E is NOT equal to mc^2!

In a world-first for mobile technology, Apple engineers have managed to package a screen larger than 4" into a handheld device which promises reasonable battery life, without sacrificing features or performance.

All very clever you say - but what's the point? After all, as so clearly stated on numerous occasions by Apple's marketing gurus, it's a well known fact that the human hand could not manage to hold or operate such a behemoth, and the human eye cannot take in so much visual information when presented at a normal hand-held viewing distance.  Well, Apple's ergonomists believe that 21st Century humans have evolved new traits in response to our immersive information- rich environment that may enable a select few to deal with such a device.

But surely there would be no point in actually manufacturing and marketing a niche device with such limited appeal? Well, Apple has decided to give it a shot, with a new product called the iPhone 6 - and let's face it, if anyone is going to take such giant strides into the unknown, it can only be a company with the huge financial resources and reputation for innovation such as Apple - no other company would have the technical prowess or financial resources for such a brave move.

IT watchers wait with bated breath to see if this bold move will make or break Apple.

In late breaking news:

It seems those copycats at Android have done it again, managing to release a number of cheap copies,  with a plethora of 4.5" to 5.5" (and bigger) models from multiple manufacturers,  all flagrantly copied from Apple's groundbreaking work,  before the iPhone 6 is actually released. Time for Apple to call the patent lawyers ...